Peace or Progress & Why We Had to Re-Prioritize

Have you ever felt like you are in a season of life tossing you around on a constant wash cycle?!? That is where we are now... recent deaths in our close friend group and community, medical needs within our family, financial strains, an off-the-farm job to name a few. All the while, we are trying to raise healthy and kind humans... I am sure I am not the only one who feels this way sometimes, but man can life be hard. When we are in this season it is hard not to feel like you have to choose between peace or progress.

Before we started raising our own livestock Brandon and I had a fairly simple life. We both worked off the farm and he helped his dad in his off time with their organic row crop enterprise. Our lives changed drastically though when I got pregnant with our first child. I started having blood pressure issues that lead to medication, constantly changing dosing and increased swelling ultimately leading to a medical emergency with a helicopter ride to save our baby's and my life. I was given a few different diagnoses and had a complicated c-section with our first born ending up in the NICU for 40 days. 

I wish I could say that our issues were only physical but with these physical struggles also came mental ones... guilt, shame and depression to name a few. As a new mom you want to protect your kids, even when still in your womb. We have this inherent desire to care for them even when some situations are out of our hands.  I was angry at myself for thinking I could have or should have eaten different, slept more, taken it easier or somehow worked harder to be healthy for her. 

This didn't just happen once, but also with our second child. Thankfully, God taught us many lessons with our first experience and we were better prepared to handle what was headed our way. In that season of our lives we thought we were at rock bottom but God knew better. He opened doors to new friendships, helped us to see the importance of time with our loved ones and also instilled a new calling on our hearts to lead by example in changing the way we utilize our land. We sold our farm equipment after having our kids and now focus on cultivating a regenerative ranch that raises the most nutrient rich meat possible. 

So if you are ever going through a season in life where you are struggling to prioritize your time, you are NOT alone! We are not immune to the everyday stressors of life. As we learn, we want to build a community where we can share our experiences, recipes and support for us moms just trying to raise healthy and kind humans! To become a part of our Herd click here.

Blessings, 

Nicole Mattison

(5th Generation)

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